Don’t Hurt In Silence

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My recent book on Sexual Abuse and Incest titled ALEXANDRA generated amazing responses from places around the web where I shared excerpts. The responses were mostly from people who were once like Alex, sexually abused by someone they trusted and looked up to for protection and had intimate relationship with family members (mostly cousins) they thought they were in love with.

Now as adult, they not only find it difficult to forgive themselves and letting go of the past but they hurt deeply and sometimes replay such events in their mind.

Would you want to let it out so WE (you and I) can pray together and trust God for healing and total restoration?

Listening, giving advice and suggestions is more than a hobby for me, it’s a CALLING. It is more than fulfilling a passion; it is something I have been ‘engraced’ to do. What an awesome privilege! The satisfaction is indescribable when after counseling, I can virtually see the smiles on faces, I can hear laughter, I can see a new enthusiasm to move on and overcome…

It’s not even really only the counseling, but the fact that we can pray and believe God on something and wait together to see it come to pass.

The truth is, sometimes life issues can become overwhelming and you just need that one person to believe in you, remind you of God’s promises and the fact that you can make it in the face of the prevailing circumstance…

Just a friend to be there for you, I am here!

Or trying to deal with a past and get over it, but it seem like the more you try the bigger the picture of the hurt…

There’s no matter too hard for God to handle…

It is God’s intention that none should suffer except those who choose to remind in disobedience, this is why He sent Jesus, “so we might have life and enjoy that life…” What an awesome expression of love.

Whatever the issue He can sort it out.

Email me ( to book a chat session now!




 “You’re familiar with the command to the ancients, ‘Do not murder.’ I’m telling you that anyone who is so much as angry with a brother or sister is guilty of murder. Carelessly call a brother ‘idiot!’ and you just might find yourself hauled into court. Thoughtlessly yell ‘stupid!’ at a sister and you are on the brink of hellfire. The simple moral fact is that words kill.” Matthew 5: 21-22

Words are very powerful and the bible testifies that words can destroy just as they can build; kind words spoken in due season is like medicine to the soul and one ill word spoken whether in and out of season is enough to ‘murder’. Continue reading



Stay single long enough and you will surely be the target of all kinds of cliché and unhelpful advice from well-meaning people and even the church. It’s unfortunate but often true that you will probably have to endure some of these “this is why you are still single” statements – whether you asked for such advice or not. Continue reading


Priscilla was a bad girl. I never liked her but she wanted to be my friend by all means. She was same age with me, but she was taller and very skinny. She was a thin girl. I was fat, short and ALEXugly. She loved playing with boys and letting the boys touch her. I hated that. She was prettier than me but I was more intelligent. Everyone in school wanted to be friends with her because of her fine face. I also thought it was a fake beauty because she used lip gloss and eyeliner sometimes to school and always had her hair in a bun. Continue reading


My name is Alexandra Oba. People call me Alex. I don’t like talking about my family because they were not very good people. Only my sister. She was also not a good person but later she started to love me. I wanted to be a nurse because I loved the white uniform. It always looked clean and smart. I dreamt everyday of me wearing it and walking around in a big hospital and a white folder in one arm. I often wondered how long I would have to be in school before that dream come through. I had told mum many times and she didn’t think someone as ugly as me was good enough to be a nurse. I was fat. Huge eyes. Continue reading



In ten years of marriage counseling, I’ve noticed certain problems that tend to be present in almost every marriage that is either in trouble or headed for trouble. Here are some tips that if sincerely followed, would eliminate many of those problems and make your marriage more successful and your faith stronger. Some are practical and some are spiritual. I hope they will all be valuable. Continue reading