Chibok and the Captives

bring-back-our-girlsWhat do you do when you find yourself constantly thinking about something; especially a situation you are not in position to positively influence? What do you do when you think about someone often, wondering about what they might be doing or how they are faring; especially when this person is not directly related to you.

This is the feeling I get on the case of the kidnapped Chibok school girls. Sometimes I wondered at myself on why the issue has taken a place in my heart. Maybe it’s because I have a daughter too. I take her to school everyday and can’t imagine after dropping her off one morning and coming back to pick her later and she’s not there! What will I do? I can’t even imagine because we don’t naturally know what we are capable of until we are faced with the situation or maybe just the worries of a mother; knowing that her daughter is alive yet not better than being dead. She can’t reach her daughter, talk to her or even know how she’s faring. She’s wakes up each morning hoping that the day would bring the miracle of her having her daughter in her arms yet that miracle has not happened for the past 70days since her daughter left. All she’s left with is hope. Hope that the government can intervene yet the seeming powerful President is equally helpless!
Hope rose again when external intervention showed up, yet the girls are still with their captors with no idea of what might be happening to them.

Nearly everyday, I am looking into the news just to get an update of the issue. As much as I am happy for the families of those girls who escaped and those released on failing health I am worried about how they can be able to live normally having being through such trauma.
But then I see many people as victims, ‘Chibok captives’ walking as free men. As sad as this analogue is even to me, there are many individuals who would rather run away from a challenge, a ‘Chibok case’ instead of facing it head-on. With the passage of time, the issue will gradually seem to die down as if it has been solved but would show up again in another form when we least expect it.

What’s your own Chibok case? Don’t take a bow and walk away hoping to wake up and see it taken care of itself. Do something! Don’t let its fear turn you to a slave. Don’t let the fear of what will happen make you retrieve when you have not even tried. FEAR
Look at it this way, “I tried but I didn’t succeed THIS TIME. I will try again. That’s the attitude I wear everyday and it helps me get through any challenge to become a better person.
What’s your take?

I still believe that the actual Chibok girls would be rescued alive.

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motherSome months ago Zara wrote me asking if I could tell her what to do to her husband who comes asking for his full right over her boobs as soon as their 4 Months old son sleeps off. According to her, he’s being doing it more frequently since the arrival of the baby and she worries that the baby won’t have enough milk by morning. He would beg her to allow him at each attempt to stop him. She ended her note with, “he makes me feel like I have to breastfeed him especially during love making’.
I was initially uncomfortable discussing this openly as Zara wanted but I received more questions from young mothers especially asking if it was fine to allow her husband ‘suck’ while still breastfeeding a baby.

New mothers like Zara believe they breastfeed their husbands during love making and some of them are not comfortable with this; mostly worried for the sake of the baby not getting enough milk later or the baby contracting some kind of infection.
I am not a medical doctor and I believe that once you are worried about issues that are medically related, you should see a doctor to put your mind at rest.

Fondling or nibbling on the boobs are great fun for men during foreplay and you should learn to cooperate and enjoy it with him. However, if you are irritated or worried that you might be bruised, before taking a decision to make him stop it, talk to him first. It is believed that most men like that part of his woman’s body when fondling.
It is also believed that some husbands do not mind ‘sharing’ from the breast milk. That doesn’t mean that you are breastfeeding him like you do to your baby. He also does not deliberately comes to you for the sake of the milk but because he misses and desires your affection.

In my opinion, if it doesn’t hurt you, then let him have fun!

See a doctor if you have medical worries.

If you can convince him to wait for you to wean the baby that is also great.
Put these aside and enjoy all the bedroom fun with your husband.

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